certified_aashiq
New Member
I don’t even know when love started feeling so tiring.
Maybe it was somewhere between asking for a little affection and pretending I didn’t need it. Wanting to be held a little longer, wanting to hear that I’m loved without having to ask, wanting those small moments of tenderness that make you feel close to someone.
I wonder how it feels to be loved without having to ask for it.
To have someone care a little too much. To wonder where you are, to notice when your voice sounds different, to ask if you’ve eaten, to get a little jealous and not hide it. To have someone who wants to know the little things, because they genuinely care about you.
Maybe today we call it possessiveness. Maybe we call it insecurity when someone admits they’re scared of losing you.
I don’t know.
Sometimes I think there’s a difference between being controlled and being cared for, between someone being too much and someone simply wanting to be a part of your world.
I wonder how it feels to have someone who doesn’t just say they love you, but shows it in all those small, almost annoying ways.
The random, where are you? The, text me when you reach. The jealousy they try to hide. The hand that reaches for yours without thinking.
The quiet concern when you’re not yourself.
Maybe none of these things are perfect.
But I think I’m tired of having to ask for even the imperfect parts of love.
Tired of wanting affection and then feeling like I’m asking for too much.
And if you ever wondered why I became quiet about the things I used to ask for,
It wasn’t because I stopped wanting them.
I just got tired of asking the person, I love to love me in ways that once felt so natural.
And I hope you never mistook my possessiveness for restrictions.
It was never about wanting to take anything away from you. Maybe I just cared a little more than I knew how to express. Maybe sometimes it came out as questions, as worry, as wanting you a little closer than usual.
I hope somewhere beneath all of that, you could still see what I was really trying to say.
That I care, That I worry, That I get scared of losing you.
And maybe I’m tired of explaining that too…..
~ The_Admirer
Maybe it was somewhere between asking for a little affection and pretending I didn’t need it. Wanting to be held a little longer, wanting to hear that I’m loved without having to ask, wanting those small moments of tenderness that make you feel close to someone.
I wonder how it feels to be loved without having to ask for it.
To have someone care a little too much. To wonder where you are, to notice when your voice sounds different, to ask if you’ve eaten, to get a little jealous and not hide it. To have someone who wants to know the little things, because they genuinely care about you.
Maybe today we call it possessiveness. Maybe we call it insecurity when someone admits they’re scared of losing you.
I don’t know.
Sometimes I think there’s a difference between being controlled and being cared for, between someone being too much and someone simply wanting to be a part of your world.
I wonder how it feels to have someone who doesn’t just say they love you, but shows it in all those small, almost annoying ways.
The random, where are you? The, text me when you reach. The jealousy they try to hide. The hand that reaches for yours without thinking.
The quiet concern when you’re not yourself.
Maybe none of these things are perfect.
But I think I’m tired of having to ask for even the imperfect parts of love.
Tired of wanting affection and then feeling like I’m asking for too much.
And if you ever wondered why I became quiet about the things I used to ask for,
It wasn’t because I stopped wanting them.
I just got tired of asking the person, I love to love me in ways that once felt so natural.
And I hope you never mistook my possessiveness for restrictions.
It was never about wanting to take anything away from you. Maybe I just cared a little more than I knew how to express. Maybe sometimes it came out as questions, as worry, as wanting you a little closer than usual.
I hope somewhere beneath all of that, you could still see what I was really trying to say.
That I care, That I worry, That I get scared of losing you.
And maybe I’m tired of explaining that too…..
~ The_Admirer